I haven’t regularly written on this blog since the end of 2017. I thought about it many times, and I have the draft posts to prove it. It’s not that I didn’t want to write anymore. I just couldn’t.

If you used to read me regularly and you’re still here, thank you! If you’re new, welcome! Either way, I’m glad you’re here. I’m going to jump back into this by recapping the last four years as succinctly as possible.

Here’s what you missed.

On August 1, 2018, I arrived in California to begin my new life. After spending 42 years in NJ, it was time for a huge change. Since then, I’ve met great people, had some good and not-so-good jobs, built a pretty successful freelance writing/editing business, earned a black belt, and worked really hard on being myself. I had always described myself as daughter, wife, mother, employee. Who is Michelle Longo? That’s what I needed to find out.

And this is now.

It’s been hotter than the surface of the sun the past few days. I don’t mind. Last night, after a lovely swim with friends and then an equally lovely swim with my kid, the clouds that had been hanging in the sky finally let loose. I went outside to look at the rain, because it’s been a while since I’ve seen any. The smell was wonderful. It only lasted a few minutes, which was enough for me, but something interesting happened. It was the first time I thought of rain as beautiful. I felt immense gratitude that I got to witness it.

This morning, I had to run an early errand. As I was driving, I couldn’t help noticing the amazing view of the mountains, the valley, and the blue sky still dotted with clouds. Life isn’t perfect here, but it sure is gorgeous. How lucky am I to get to live here?

Here’s the thing. It isn’t luck. I worked my ass off to get where I am today. I have been through so much crap, and I’m still here. There were times when I wasn’t sure I was going to make it, and there were plenty where I didn’t even want to try anymore. I’m so glad I didn’t give up. I wish I’d been a lot kinder to myself through it all, but I’m learning. Every day is another opportunity, and only recently did I discover how to be grateful for that.

Onward.

On August 1, after a few less-than-stellar months, I started taking steps toward new goals, and that’s what made me want to bring this blog back to life. Somewhere in the archives here, there’s a post about how my 40s were going to be the decade where everything changed. At 46, if I do nothing else, I’ll certainly be able to say that’s true. But why stop now? I’ve got a little time left before I turn 50, so why not hit that milestone living my best life?

The work now is to define what that best life looks like, outline the steps to get there, and then crush them. I’m going to share that journey here. In between, I’m sure I’ll share some old stories (I’m still a memoirist at heart) and go off-topic now and again just because I feel like it. I invite you to join me and to share your thoughts in the comments or social.

I missed writing. It feels good to be back.